Weekly Gleek: Keeping Bats out of Your Womb is an Important Part of Having a Baby When you’re Older than God

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Weekly Gleek: Keeping Bats out of Your Womb is an Important Part of Having a Baby When you’re Older than God

Glee is back, bitches! And Sue Sylvester wants you to know that you’re all still sloppy babies. Even though the leaked photos of wheelchair-Quinn emerged almost immediately after the cliffhanger aired, there were still a lot of ulcer-inducing, unanswered questions at the start of last night’s ep, and the writers wasted no time making sure they were answered in the traditional Glee meta-method. The scene opens on Finn and Rachel walking down the hall, some indeterminate amount of time after the last episode (I’m thinking real time—so, about 2 months?), having more or less the following super-helpful conversation:

Rachel: It’s been a while since we checked in with the fans. Do you think they’ll be able to infer that we did not in fact get married as a result of Quinn’s near fatal car crash?

Finn: Don’t worry, babe, I won’t let a little thing like your secret girlfriend’s near death experience get in the way of our horrible teenage life choices. We just need to tell the audience that Nationals is in Chicago this year, so that’s where we’ll get married. It’s all good!

Rachel: You are an idiot. God, I hope the writers don’t actually make me marry you.

Then Quinn rolls up behind them and Rachel nearly dissolves in tears, while also beaming like she just found out that Barbra Streisand is her long-lost relative, because she’s so happy that Quinn is still alive. Quinn herself is super-chipper about the whole situation, claiming that this is in fact the best day of her life ‘cause she’s not dead, and goes into the first of two cheerfully upbeat duets with Artie about how awesome it is to be in a wheelchair.

I have pretty lukewarm feelings about this number; the sentiment of overcoming adversity is good, but it just seemed a bit flat for the intensity of the subject matter. If I were being really generous, I’d give the writers the benefit of the doubt and postulate that this is what they’re actually going for right now; because Quinn is still in denial about the reality and severity of her situation (which is reinforced soon after by her suggestion that they all go to Six Flags for senior ditch day). Still think they could’ve picked a better song, though. And for Grilled Cheezus’ sake, stop auto-tuning Dianna’s



Comments [4]

Marcie Bianco's picture

Kentucky Fried Stripper

Kentucky Fried Stripper sexual tension!!!!!

and, wow, Puck is good with the relationship advice. Why DOES it have to be all about Rachel? FO REALZ

Jenny Aisenberg's picture

well...

ok dude, in this case I am totally in rachel's corner. she does have her narcissistic moments of COURSE, but this situation is completely unfair to her. she has always said she was going to broadway when she graduated. she has been saying that before she and finn even met. meanwhile, what big dreams has finn expressed...? ZEEERO. now suddenly he realizes he has no idea where his life is going, and rachel's just being selfish if she won't change her ENTIRE LIFE PLAN so he can fulfil his "dream" of running a pool cleaning business with puck. it's a lifelong dream they thought of five minutes ago. but hey, actually I think puck is right-- finn needs to think about his own future. that's the thing to do when you're 18...not get married!! we'll see what professor whoopi has to say about all this.  

"We're all born naked. The rest is drag."
--RuPaul (appropriating Judith Butler for the masses...)

Marcie Bianco's picture

lolz. agreed. ...oh, but

lolz. agreed. ...oh, but where does COMPROMISE enter into a relationship? Smile

Another fav moment: when Sue referred to Santana as "sandbags" aka "sandbags mcgee" -- damn, it's been a while! lolz

Jenny Aisenberg's picture

compromise enters at adulthood ;)

yes, mos def, compromise is an important ingredient in any adult relationship...I think the point is that these idiots are too young to put that compromise above their basic life dreams. when you're 18 and you're just launching yourself off into adult life, you gotta know the difference between compromise (i.e., I want to live in a mansion but we're not rich yet, so we'll live in an apt for now), versus sacrificing your entire set of goals and dreams (i.e., I want to move to new york and pursue live theater because it's my lifelong dream; but you want to move to LA and clean pools, so I'll just tag along and squash my broadway dreams into a tv-and-film sized hole, and slowly grow to hate you for the rest of our lives for making me give up the only thing I ever wanted in life). this is why you should not get married at 18. ammi right??

"We're all born naked. The rest is drag."
--RuPaul (appropriating Judith Butler for the masses...)